Le Journey : Blogging

Assalamualaikum 💝

Hello! It's the end of July already. I feel like writing after soooooo long. This post would be a collection of my life updates that I can think of since my last post.

Edit: This post is dedicated to my wisdom tooth extraction since it got way longer that I expected haha other updates will be in the next post (I presume).

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It started a week after Hari Raya Puasa. My teeth on the right side of my mouth were aching but I couldn't pinpoint which one. I let it be for a few days, thinking the pain might go away soon but girl was I wrong. I remember having a big meeting one day and it started hurting so bad that I felt angry haha.

The next day, I went to see the dental clinic I frequented to previously for my braces. My usual dentist wasn't there, so another dentist did a check-up on me. He suspected that it was my sunken wisdom tooth that's causing the pain, so he took an X-Ray. It turned out my wisdom tooth was decaying and it was starting to affect my nerves (the very reason why it was affecting the whole teeth on the right side).

I could only laugh when I heard the news because I knew what that meant; that tooth needs to be extracted. When I had my braces on, my dentist told me a few times that I might need to extract that wisdom tooth since it was hard to clean (sunken to one side) and not useful anyway. But I didn't want to proceed because in order to get rid of it, I need to go through a minor surgery and that scared me.

I avoided the topic quite a few times up until my last appointment and POOF! I had to face it again this time. Sigh. I remember the doctor saying,

"I think Dr. XX pernah suruh you cabut gigi ni kan"

and I laughed awkwardly together with him😂 Welp, there was no escape this time. The next week, I went to the public dental clinic because a private one would be too expensive 😐 The dentist there also took an X-Ray and said the same thing. I booked for an appointment for the wisdom tooth extraction. Usually, it would take a while before they call you to confirm the date but alhamdulillah, that afternoon I got a call saying that someone cancelled their appointment so there's a free slot for me the next day.

And there I went.

To be honest, I wasn't THAT nervous because I felt like I've been there before. I got a few of my teeth extracted before and it hurt, but wasn't so bad. However, it was a minor surgery this time. Someone told me they couldn't eat for one whole week because of the pain, took them weeks to recover. That's what made me nervous.

When I entered the room, there was a dentist and her assistant (maybe, I'm not quite sure). I signed an agreement on the risks of the surgery etc etc. I was given anaesthetic at three points in my mouth and it HURT but was expected. When my mouth felt numb, the dentist made her way to the wisdom (probably stupid) tooth.

I didn't feel pain at first, but I could hear and kind of feel the whole process. I don't know what exactly was being grinded; was it the bone or the gums? After a while, the pain started knocking in when they were tearing at my tooth, trying to pluck it out. It was so painful to the point that I almost laughed in the middle of the surgery. Bruh it's still funny to think about that moment 😂 Imagine if I actually started laughing while they were doing their job. Mesti diorang fikir "wah budak ni sakit sampai jadi gila ke"😂

I thought that was painful enough, but I was wrong. Again. The pain gradually increased. I was fighting off the pain but at one point, I started to cry. My tears just flowed down my cheek and the dentist got worried. To be fair, the anaesthetics worked just fine but it's not helping when someone is trying to take off a tooth buried deep inside your gums.

I got so tired, slowly getting really exhausted. My whole body felt weak. I gave up. There was no way I could fight it. The corners of my mouth were dry and hurting. I felt dizzy, the terrible headache kept coming at the back of my head all the time when I was holding the pain and tears. The pain was so dreadful to the point that I prayed for Allah to take me immediately if the time has come for me to go.

It was unbearable. That was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. Not even my awful menstrual cramps can beat that.

It took nearly two hours to get the whole thing done. The people there asked if I was okay, and I said yes. But once I was out of the room, I started crying. All the tears that I had been holding in just burst out. I walked my way to the pharmacy. It was 5.30pm at the time, and the pharmacy was closed. But there was someone there, so I asked if I could still get the medicines prescripted. At first, he said no. But after looking at me, he asked for my prescription and asked me to wait. It was probably because of my red eyes.

When I was waiting in front of the pharmacy, the assistant (?) came and checked on me. But I was crying so badly so I gave him a thumbs up while crying HAHAHA ARGH THAT WAS SO EMBARRASSING 😂 He asked me if someone was picking me up, I said I drove there and started crying even harder ahshsh and then he left. I think he said something else but I don't remember.

After the guy left, I couldn't control my tears anymore. It wasn't much because of the pain, but I just felt so so sad that I had to go through such extreme pain and had been holding it for two hours and I was alone then. By the time the pharmacist came, I was crying and sobbing like a little kid. Even the way he spoke to me was like conversing with a child HAHA because I was listening to him while sobbing. I don't even remember much of what he said.

But I feel thankful for all the kind words and empathy I received that day.

My drive home was full of tears and pain. The pain got extremely horrible as the anaesthetics went away. I couldn't even fall asleep the first night. My energy was gone but it was too painful for me to sleep it off. My face got swollen the next day and I swear half of my face looked like Adudu hahaha. The corners of my mouth were torn. I put serum and Bio-Oil on the wound. It worked wonders! Alhamdulillah, after around three days, the wound started healing and no scar was left behind.

Overall, I think it took me around three weeks for the pain to completely go away. It was a scary experience but I'm glad I did it. Otherwise, my teeth would still be aching to this day.

Till the next post!

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Assalamualaikum.

WOW I HAVEN'T BEEN HERE FOR SO LONG AND NOW BLOGGER HAS CHANGED HAHA. I can't even find the emojis anywhere sheesh I'm too used to expressing myself using emojis. My writing feels angry when there isn't one. Or am I the only one who feels this way?

I honestly don't know why I'm here. I did my online presentation on green awareness today. Like finally, I got the chance to. It's a "first come, first serve" kind of presentation, so everyone was trying to seize the opportunity to present. I've been practising for two days and if I still didn't get to present today, I even thought of giving up lol.

How's life? Life's been good, alhamdulillah. A quick summary of 2020 so far:

I finished my final exams in January, that was the last time I saw my classmates.

After the exams, I went hiking with Hazim at Bukit Batu Putih, which was much much easier than Gunung Datuk. But the route to and from the beach was super hard and steep bruh me being me, I wanted to give up. But that was nothing compared to my prior experience. At least I didn't cry this time.

(Note to self: Buy a new pair of sports shoes if you want to go hiking again.)

I underwent internship at RAYMINTEX, Nuklear Malaysia for eight weeks. I loved it there. I don't know if I said this in my previous post. but everyone was really nice. They taught us instead of scolding. They showed us instead of ordering. Everyone was just very very helpful and accommodating. To be very honest, I didn't want to leave that place. I would really love to work with them. During my first week there, I even said that I had a feeling that I was going to miss this place. Farewell is always a huge problem to me because I just have this huge attachment to things that make me happy. I'm hoping to see them again someday. And that was also the last time I saw my other classmates undergoing internship at Nuklear Malaysia.

MCO happened. I've gone out exactly twice since then. It doesn't really bother me that I can't go out though. That's how much of a homebody I am. It feels nice to spend every day with my family. I do miss my friends sometimes but that's about it. UiTM also decided that there would only be online classes this semester. That means the next time I'm going to see my classmates is during our graduation day.

I don't think much has happened since then. Aside from online classes and assignments. There are times when I'd think about my future. What am I going to do for work, am I going to pass the interviews, will I be able to repay my parents' hard work in raising me, will I be able to take care of them the way they have been caring for me. I think about all those stuff.

Life is hard, adulting is even harder.

I'm thinking of editing my blog again. Someday.

I ALSO NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW THIS NEW BLOGGER WORKS.

Take care everyone.

Stay home, and if you can't, stay safe.

Wash your hands frequently,

wear face masks if you're sick,

avoid crowded public areas,

and practise social distancing.

Praying for everyone's health and safety. Do pray for mine and my family's too.

Till the next post!

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Assalamualaikum 💖

Hello there hehe it's been super loooonngg since I actually talked about something here. It's the toughest semester yet. Two subjects are killing me currently. I'm done with one of them but I still have a project to finish for the other one.😕 I'm actually, really, scared if I fail anything this semester. They're too hard to score and I can't bear to repeat them in the coming semesters. Like NO. The project that I'm doing is based on SolidWorks ugh I'm still struggling with it. It sounded doable and easy during our first lecture, but now I feel like crying because of this. I can already go home right at this instant, but this project is holding me back. It feels impossible for me to do it by myself.

Do I regret not starting the project much earlier? Yes, I do.

I just wanna go homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

But anyway, Selamat Hari Raya everyone! It's been a week but as long as it's still Syawal the greeting is valid ok haha. My family's theme for this year was maroon. Frankly I disliked my baju raya at first. I only bought it because while going out with my family, I was the only one left who hadn't found anything to wear at the time (this happens every year tbh😂). At one point we found a baju kurung which I wasn't that fond of, but my sisters said that it was pretty. I felt like my family was getting tired of walking around, in and out of shops, and even I was getting tired and annoyed at myself like WHY can't you just find one outfit WHY?! Hence I decided to just take that baju kurung. I didn't like it since I bought it when I was upset at myself, but on the first day of raya I was like "Oh cantik jugak" HAHAHAHA. Dahlah kau mengada je lebih eh.

I thought of writing a short story and post it here, but unfortunately my creativity has long since left my soul. The last time I actually wrote a short story was probably during my SPM days, both in Malay and English hihi. Maybe I'll start something and Idk if it turns out good, I'll post it here. If not, just forget the fact that I even said it in the first place. But even if I were to write one, it's going to have to wait until I manage to find the time to write about what I did last February hehehe I'M SO EXCITED!! Insyaallah I'm going to start with it this coming semester break hehe💖

I think that's about it. I just wanted to make a short update here since I miss blogging so much.😟 Pray for me and wish me luck for this unfinished project and also final exams that are going to start next week!😋

Till the next post!😸

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Assalamualaikum 💝

I WENT TO THE SUPER JUNIOR D&E CONCERT!!

A lightstick that I borrowed from a kind ELF

Okay so when it was announced that D&E would be coming to Malaysia, Ain and I were both like 'let's not go ok don't waste any more money on kpop jangan hasut aku lagi' because we just each bought an album (Epik High for me, Park Bom for her) (P.S. legends) at the time. We were reaaaallyy determined to not go to this one.

HOWEVER, two days before the concert, Donghae posted a picture on Instagram saying that he was coming to Malaysia and THIS GIRL just had the nerve to make a story about it and I don't even know why I replied to it and all of a sudden we were questioning (PERSUADING) each other to actually go to the concert???? Like she checked the ticketing website and tickets were still available and we asked for our families' permission and after hours of screaming and a little bit of madness POOF there you go. Two CAT3 tickets bought with less than 48 hours remaining for preparation. 😌

4th May 2019. D-Day.

The weather forecast showed that it was going to rain that day so I brought a raincoat and a cap with me. Met up with Ain at the KTM station and we couldn't stop smiling dude like I kept giggling every now and then. There were a lot of people wearing blue so we assumed that they, too, were going to the concert😂. Anyway, we took the 10:37 a.m. train to KL Sentral, and transferred to another train going to Batu Tiga Station. We reached the station around 1:00 p.m. so we didn't really have hopes for any freebies by then. At the station, though, we bumped into two ELFs in the surau and decided to go to the venue together via GrabCar hehe.

Here goes a funny but not that funny story. Ain and I were excitedly wearing our caps since someone tweeted that it was scorching hot at the Malawati Stadium, where the concert would be held. Nevertheless, the moment the car moved, rain droplets started to fall on the windscreen... We honestly wanted to hide from the driver and the other two ELFs. It wasn't even light rain, it was showering doh haha we kept whatsapp-ing each other since I was in the front seat, exclaiming how embarrassing it was. We ended up taking our caps off at the same time.😂😂

It was still raining when we arrived so we put our raincoats on. We couldn't even take pictures with the standees because of the strong winds.😐 Got our tickets from the ticketing booth and had to squeeze ourselves between human beings under the tents. At that point, there really wasn't a little bit of hope of getting any kind of freebies, but all of a sudden someone was going around giving out her freebies and I was overjoyed because that was the only freebie that we got that day (guess who's feeling grateful? :') ) It probably took an hour or so for us to get in and in that duration I just wanted to get out of there as my clothes were both damp from the rain and sweaty at the same time EWW.

When we could finally move, I started jumping and running around again as the excitement returned! (Even my fingers are excited to type right now😂) Scanned our tickets and went up the stairs to get to our seats on the third floor. I don't know about the other floors but our floor was soooooo dark and I could barely see anything without my flashlight on, and the height of our seats were not helping at all. Aku pulak of course lah gayat ha dah sedar diri sikit sejak naik gunung haritu so elak pandang bawah masa jalan. Our seats were on the second farthest back and right side of the stadium, but it was fine since the view was still satisfying. As we waited for the concert to start, people at the back of our seats moved to the middle zone (a more expensive one) and we followed suit since the zone was barely filled hehe and that's how we managed to upgrade our seats!😂

The ticket and handheld banner

Our new view!

Before the concert started, Ain mentioned about this one ELF sitting next to her having a lot of lightsticks and I don't know if the ELF heard her or not, but she offered to lend us her other lightsticks omg who would say no to that?! That was very kind of her doh I'm still grateful to her until today, as she's the reason that we were able to enjoy the concert even more!💖 If somehow you're reading this, I thank you from the bottom of my heart and I hope everything goes well for you!

We took the picture in a rush as people started screaming, signalling the start of the concert!

I recorded a lot this time sebab taknak acah feel the moment as I did during the BTOB Fan Meeting last year because I ended up forgetting most of it anyway. Donghae spoke a lot of Mandarin the whole concert and I was like no I don't understand sweetie I'm only a beginner level student in Mandarin :')) The translator didn't translate the Mandarin parts (or did she?) so the only things that I knew were wo ai ni wo hen gaoxing and all that hahaha. He made me feel like studying Mandarin even harder and more diligently from that moment onwards.

The lights were beautiful and I was proud of participating among the blue ocean of lightsticks💙

After the concert, we really didn't want to move from our seats, so we stayed there and took pictures until we heard people blowing whistles, probably asking us to leave haha. I said goodbye to the ELFs sitting beside me and could see how ELFs are the mature fandom who are just kind to each other.

Never forgetting this experience :(

There were a lot of funny moments that I only found out through my videos and other fancams because we were sitting tooooooo far in the back to notice. On our way back to Seremban, I watched the videos that I took and had to stop myself from laughing out loud as my voice was too high-pitched and excited when doing the fanchants, especially during Oppa Oppa. Man it was hilarious! It made me go like 'aw girl you're that excited huh'. 😂

The duration of the whole concert was around 2.5 hours. It felt short, but long enough to keep us content. I don't regret this last-minute decision one bit. It felt nice to finally see Super Junior members (even if only two of them) in front of my own eyes. The feeling was quite different from what I felt with BTOB last year. Like, you know, finally seeing someone whom you've liked for quite a long time, but feeling like you'll keep seeing them in the future. I don't even know why I felt that way but I have high hopes for Super Show now. That's probably the reason why I moved on much faster than when I did with BTOB.😛

The only freebies that I got 😂

Aside from the freebies, we bought D&E lanyards outside the venue after the concert just to add to our poor amount of freebies. 😂 I don't even wear my university lanyard but I was sooo proud of wearing Eunhyuk lanyard all the way back to Seremban. Eunhyuk was my first SJ bias, and I found out that Donghae was Ain's first SJ bias, and now we're both back to having them as our biases. 😝