Well, it's been a long time since I wrote something on this blog. I've been busy with assignments, quizzes and tests (life test also) just as any student would be during the final weeks of the semester. I wouldn't say that time flew so fast because I know how much I suffered from homesickness and kept complaining that time was not on my side haha.

I got home yesterday and this is why I'm able to write now! I've officially finished ALL my tests and assignments yesterday and wow it was a great feeling since it's finally over! Err not really over but you know what I mean. I just unpacked my luggage just now and it's funny how I was unpacking the same stuff that I reluctantly packed three months ago. I feel like hugging the three-months-ago me and say "There, there, you're gonna be okay soon. Don't give up because I didn't." and pat her head while laughing silently.😂

So, have you heard the news? I still can't believe that he's gone. His songs are still playing in my head as I'm typing this. It just doesn't feel real to me. The happy guy that we all know. Sigh. My timeline was full of people talking about him, but it only hit me when I read the letter.

Depression, guys. Depression.

I hate how some people make jokes about depression and suicide. I hate these people's mentalities. Just because they've never been through depression, they're being insensitive about it. Worst of all, people who do it to seek attention. I'm not saying this because of the K-Pop soul in me, but I'm saying this as a human.

Depression is totally not a joke. Do you make jokes about people who are sick physically? Like someone with cancer or just about any kind of health disease that we know. No, right? Well, normal and sane people wouldn't.

It should be the same for people with depression. The only difference is that you can't see how painful it is physically, because it's happening inside their heads. The struggle to get out of the problems, the fear of people's reactions if they find out, and the deep pain and scream inside that they just want to stop. They might as well do anything just to make the pain stop.

There's this quote that I read on Twitter:

It only takes a moment for that demon in our heads to take control of our minds and decide, 

"This is the perfect moment to die."

It's true. Someone doesn't just think "Oh I'm going to kill myself today." out of nowhere without a warning. The process is not that simple. Not all people who face depression is willing to share it with other people because they're scared of the reactions that they will get. Why? Because our judgmental society makes them feel that way.

I'm no psychologist, but to anyone who's facing depression, I beg you to seek help, or tell your close ones about it.  Let them help you. It will end one day, insyaallah. Seek Allah SWT and strengthen your faith. I'm not going to make it sound so simple, but please don't give up. Ever. There's always a solution to everything. EVERYTHING. So never ever give up, I'm begging you.

To everyone else, please always be kind to others. I'm not perfect myself so I may not always be kind. But we should try to be. We don't know what other people are going through. Just a simple smile from a stranger can help gather up someone's courage again. We never know. Always be sensitive to others. Never ridicule people who have problems. Again, because we never know what they're going through.

Just be nice.


Forgive me if there's any mistake in this post. Be strong, everyone.