Assalamualaikum 💖

Hi there! I feel the urge to write today. 

Nothing urgent, though. I just had the impulse to post a story on Instagram, describing my experience. But then it got too long and I thought, why not do it on my blog instead?

I truly, truly, miss writing. Writing makes me feel soooo good. It helps me to express my emotions, more so especially because I find it hard to talk about my feelings. My feelings are better expressed through writing, although I feel like I'm improving these days hahaha sebab whenever I feel like nak ngadu to my man, I always end up using voice note since I find it faster and easier. However, my thoughts are always better organized and let out through writing. It's more detailed since all thoughts that I have in my head are let out. It also helps me to remember the stories and certain emotions that come with them. I LOVE IT.

That's what writing does for me, even though I rarely write these days. I just find it to be a hassle to switch on my laptop to write on my blog. I can write on my phone, sure, but it doesn't feel the same. I love the feeling and sound of the clacking keyboard when I write a full length story. My phone pun ada that keyboard sound, but it's not the same. Nak tulis physically? Lagilah malas 😭 My handwriting has been getting so bad after I graduated secondary school. It's like doctor's handwriting in which only I can understand. One time, my ex-manager saw my handwriting and said "jarang tengok perempuan tulisan macam ni". Hahaha I was not offended; I was more like in an utter disbelief and amusement at the same time because he actually has the same handwriting as me! 😂

But anyway, I want to write on my experience meeting doctors regarding period pain.

My period pain can get extreme at times. To the point that I would throw up or get diarrhea with it. Usually, when I experience the extreme pain, I would take a leave from work. But there was one time last year that I decided to get an MC instead in order to get a diagnosis from the doctor; is my condition normal or not? When I met the doctor and told him that I was having period pain, he snickered. As if my pain wasn't enough, I had to meet this scornful doctor who might have thought my condition was like "meh". Ugh. Since then, I never went to doctors again for period pain issues.

However, this time, I just started working at my new company. Alhamdulillah, overall, it's been good. I might talk about this in some other posts if I rajin haha. Since I've only been there for two months, I didn't want to take too many leaves just yet. So I had no other choice than to take an MC. 

I went to the clinic, secretly hoping that I'll meet a female doctor who would understand me. But as I opened the door to the treatment room, I saw a male figure behind the desk. There was an immediate mixture of disappointment and hope at that moment. I felt skeptical towards the doctor due to my previous experience, but to my surprise, he was nothing like what I thought. Astaghfirullah, I should have husnudzon towards him. He looked concerned about my pain and gave me an injection of painkillers, which was probably the most painful injection I have ever received. The pain lingered on for soooo long until I reached home. But as the pain on my arm subsided, my menstrual cramps did, too. Alhamdulillah.

And that's the story of me who stereotyped male doctors haha. Just like how not all flowers look the same, I shouldn't have judged them to have the same mindset when it comes to period pain. It's just unfair of me to do that. My faith in humanity has been restored hewhew.

Till the next post!